"...hi, it's Jen."

I always feel somewhat fake when I introduce myself by my name. In a way, I feel more of a sense of attachment to my last name than my first, and that may be because it's so uncommon (my last name, that is).

When I give my name, I feel as if it's not really who I am, or something, that I'm only pretending to be "Jen" for now, and in reality, my name is something long and convoluted involving sixteen syllables and four silent 'q's, but that more accurately describes who the being known as me is.

When I was younger, I wanted to change my name. There were so many Jens, and I quickly grew tired of being called Jenny (always annoying when I run into old classmates from elementary years who still call me such, because I feel that they don't reflect the fact that I've grown up), and at the time my name was so common, and I wanted something different and exotic and unusual.

Sure, people who had different and exotic and unusual names had their difficulties too, but there was never any doubt as to who they were -- Jamine, Sandra, Kristen, Siobhan -- all of these girls were different and special and popular... and then there was dorky little me in the corner with my name that was shared by two other Jens at the time and later, in grade nine gym class, five other Jens -- there didn't appear to be any sort of special identity reserved for me.

But now I'm older and popularity is less of an issue and I've developed a unique(ish) identity to go with my humdrum name. I may be only a Jen, but we're a pretty popular bunch, and that's no longer such a bad thing. Now, I may be "Jen" and that may not be the easiest way to identify me (although the numbers of Jens are decreasing, at least in my circles), but I'm a lot of other things too; as Ben says, "short, blonde, kicks people." I also wear glasses. :)

I'm open, I'm honest, I have a tattoo and some interesting piercings, I can talk about any subject as comfortably as talking about my cats, I love animals and my cats in particular (and my homicidal fish!), I have a nurturing streak, I like to help out my friends but I hate being taken advantage of, I love to talk (thanks, my parents), I love to read, I play clarinet, I like to cross stitch... there's an awful lot that's gone into making this particular Jen, and it's not all that bad.

At the same time, this particular Jen needs to get dressed to head off to work (although I am on my own time somewhat, having skipped class -- another thing this particular Jen does a lot of this semester), so that's that from my shower thoughts today.