This is gonna be a long one... I was working on an update last week, never got back to it, and now I have more to add. A week since I last updated -- I am a bad mommy. :(

Welp, I am both strong and weak. Mostly weak, though. *sigh* We'll see how well this winds up working. I have no confidence in myself!

I also finally got some lock de-icer last night, and de-iced the fuck out of my mailbox. Couldn't get it open last night, but I did this morning. Success, and mail! Finally, after only about oh, say, 2 weeks? Urgh. Stupid Canada Post. Normally, I like you, but lately, you have upset me. I haven't even gotten a phone call back about the message I left last night, although maybe it was just a recording and not an actual answering machine. I was too tired yesterday to notice and/or care.

I also had keys left in my mailbox to unlock the parcel sections of the box, so I found that exciting and different -- and it meant that I had two other locks to deice. Annoying, but doable at least. Two more books for me, 'cause I don't already have enough to read. These at least will be quick reads, since they're light books.

Funny moment:

Me: And funny story/coincidence -- about a week or two after I decided that pursuing my interests was the best way of meeting someone I'm likely to have commonalities with ('cause, y'know, cross stitching is just such a group event), I have learned of a fetish ball that I will be attending! I will meet Mr. Perfect! *grin*
Friend: At a fetish ball? :) Fantastic.
Friend: Mister Perfect, or Mister Pervert? :)
Me: Well, sometimes Mister Perfect has a little Mister Pervert to him. :)
Friend: Funny story/Coincidence, that's the name I've given my manly bits. ;)
[other talk]
Friend: So tell me more about this fetish ball. What are you going as?
You should dress up like a giant foot.
Me: I'd been thinking something more simple, like corset, skirt, and accoutrements
Friend: You have a corset?
Friend: Well, duh. I guess it makes sense that I'd never seen you wear it. I was going to go "Oh, I've never seen it."
Me: *rofl*
Me: I have two of 'em, and one that's more meant to be worn in public, but I haven't worn it yet.
Friend: Watch out for wardrobe malfunctions. Especially if Justin Timberlake is there.
Me: Not quite the same look :)
Friend: If I were going to this thing, I'd go in an outfit entirely composed of whipped cream. :)
Me: Well, lower dirty parts must be kept covered, so there goes part of that -- unless you made it out of some kind of foam sealant material that wouldn't melt.
Friend: Where's the fun in that? :)
Friend: What if I dressed up as a vagina? Then my whole -outfit- would be lower bits.
Friend: Maybe I'd have to be a Vagina in a Trenchcoat.
Me: You are strange, and I'm never telling you anything again. :)
Friend: People could ask "Are you wearing anything under that trenchcoat?" and I could say in a high-pitched voice "I am a -VAGINA-!"
Me: Why does a vagina speak with a high pitched voice?
Friend: It doesn't... I do!
Friend: *squeee*!
Me: ...
Friend: *laugh*
Friend: Okay, I'm even freaking myself out. :)
Friend: I'll stop. :)
However, I still think that would be a good costume. ;)
Me: Yeah, well, apparently you're dirtier than I knew. :)
Friend: Hey, there's nothing dirty about a vagina!
Me: I didn't say that... though dressing up as one probably starts getting you closer.
Friend: That's where life springs forth!
Me: I own one, I know their benefits. :)
Friend: Fair enough. :)
Me: Whereas you, as a boy, only have your dirty appreciation of vaginas. Therefore, you is a pervert. :)
Friend: Yeah yeah. Way to go gender discrimination!

Identity removed to protect my dirty friends. :)

Being a grownup sucks. I wish I could be more impulse-oriented and just follow my whims, but feelings must be taking into consideration.

On a totally separate note, if you haven’t seen the episode of Whose Line is it Anyway? where Richard Simmons appears, well, here’s a segment just for you. Awesome. Although there might be server issues. If that doesn’t load, google “Richard Simmons” and “Whose Line is it Anyway?” I promise, it’s worth it.

Anyhow, what has my week been like? Urgh. Crazy. The last two weeks have been fairly non-stop, and this week I’m trying to make time for everything.

Last week... Monday I went to the gym, then went and did something after the gym. I don’t remember what. I think that was the great lock de-icer day. Tuesday, I was supposed to go skating with someone, but I wound up rescheduling it and hanging out with the marshmallow (also knows as PDB).

Wednesday I cancelled on the gym to try to chase down my parcel from Canada Post, went to the wrong location (because they sent it to a different one than my regular location), and then I got together with Markuk. He brought over Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, which I hadn’t seen, and which I really enjoyed. I just found it really easy to relate to – which is always nice when it comes to movies that are a bit ‘different.’

Thursday I was supposed to learn working out stuff with the marshmallow, but we ended up just hanging out and playing video games instead. I blame him. Friday, JJ and I went out for dinner and then we went to the Jeff Healey concert, which was really good. Jeff Healey was dancing and jumping on stage, and everyone was joking – his voice is really well-suited to the new style he’s doing, too. One of the ticket-rippers was an English teacher at my old high school – one that I’d never had, but she recognized me and remembered my first name. Scary... I never had this woman, and I graduated high school five years ago! English teachers are scary..

Saturday, I did some shopping with my mom and my youngest cousin, who’s working in town for the next few months as part of a co-op term. We seemed to get along fairly well; when Mom was setting up the day, she was mentioning that she thought my cousin felt somewhat overwhelmed with all the differences between here and home and her university life... I think it was implied in some way that I could probably do a good job making her feel comfortable, and I know that Mom did actually use the line “Jenny, after they made you, they broke the mold,” on me, which was new and kinda cool. :D I picked up a new video game, a book, a CD and some trashy underwear from La Senza (which just isn’t as high on the trashy scale as La Vie En Rose is), including a pair of these funky Brazilian shorts or whatever they’re called, which resemble something like this, at least to my quick morning search. Not best worn with essentially freshly-washed jeans, but still nice nonetheless.

I was supposed to borrow the car to drive out to the backwoods to meet up with JJ, N and S, but once I started doing the math on the travel time involved, I opted not to. Since I’d already agreed to join the marshmallow and his friends for a poker game that night, I felt a bit more obligated to attend that. Which I did, and it was fun.

After not getting much sleep Saturday night, I got up early Sunday and ran around the old stomping grounds, chasing down things for the stupid IKEA curtain rod, for the cats, and so on. I also picked up seasons 3 and 4 of Futurama for me. I get presents, too!

Dad came over and he and the marshmallow went around putting up various things in my apartment – a shelf, pictures, a clock, etc. – and I washed my dishes. Exciting, but necessary. :) Afterwards, it was off to the station and the evening of crazy that was to ensue. Gah.

Where to start? I actually made a list so that I could make sure I remembered it all. One sec...

Let’s see, during the last fifteen minutes or so of the first show, I had a guy call in who didn’t want to go on air, but did want to complain about the “unchristian” language that was being used on the show, with people using the Lord’s name in vain – and because I’m already going to Hell and I’m a terrible person, I just wanted to say, “Jesus Christ!” I mentioned it to my newsreader, and she started laughing and saying things like, “Goddammit, what the *Hell* is going on!” and so on. At least I’ll have good company in Hell.

Ummm, what else? Well, at one point I went out to see if there was water in the newsroom, and JP, the later newscaster (male) was out there, and said something like, “Oh, and don’t let me tell you about *Jen*...” so I geared up a fake kidney punch, but accidentally clipped his elbow on the way. I must’ve got him just right, ‘cause then his arm went numb, and there was much cursing and swearing on his part. I felt kinda bad, but then the first newscaster started laughing, so then we started making fun of him instead.

From there, there was David, who called in to discuss gay marriage, but whose call ranged from, and I shit you not:

* Off-air, with just me: saying that it was new voice on the phone, I said that no, it’s always me Sunday nights. He said that usually it was guys who answer, and I said that not during this shift, since I’d been doing it for four years. I moved on to asking, “can I get your name?” he countered with: “what’s yours?” I answered, “Jen.” He said, “Oh, Jen (last name)?” I said no. He left a big pause, then, “Jen who?” I said, “Jen who produces this show.” He said, “what’s your last name?” I said, “I’m not giving you my last name,” then finally got his damn info so I could put him on hold.
* Talking about how he used to breed rats, and how he was trying to remember if he’d ever seen any of the guys go after the other guys, and couldn’t think of a time, but that he always knew when the guys went after the girls... ‘cause what, his rats only ever had sex in front of him?
* Then he moved on to how he thinks that if men want to parade around in pantyhose and high heels, they should, ‘cause he thinks society would be more accepting of that, but probably not of gay marriage. He kept bringing up cross-dressing, so newsreader and I are convinced he himself is a cross-dresser.
* Then, he said how, if he sees a woman with a ring, and he looks at her face and she’s beautiful, and she’s wearing a ring, he considers her an “untouchable,” and that she’s off-limits. Not that that means that she’s the guy’s property, or that he’s hers, but that ring means she’s not available.

I shit you not, that was his conversation. It made my brain hurt.

Then, to top the night off just right, our most infamous crazy started calling. He called, I told him he wasn’t allowed on air, he hung up on me. He called back a bit later, called me an idiot, I hung up on him. He called back again, I hung up on him – did that twice more, I think. He called again, told me that I wasn’t an idiot, I was a fucking idiot, and here’s where I just gave up and said, “Fuck you, (name),” and hung up on him. First time I’ve said that to a caller. Apparently that just sent him into hysterics and he called security and so on – and I had my suspicions confirmed that he does in fact seem to target me more than others. Yay.

*sigh* Then it was home and bedtime, more or less. Not enough sleep, but story of my life. At least there wasn’t any cat pee on the bed in the morning, though she did pee sometime on Sunday. Yay. :P Ah well, she has a new litterbox now, and new litter, and me frustrated.... we’ll see how well this works.


Bad hormones! No cookie!

Random euphemisms for sex: being bounced around the bed/bouncing someone around the bed, tossing someone around/being tossed around, humping someone's bunny...

My father is a horrible human being. In response to this quote from bash.org:
*** Signoff: AntiNorm (Quit: Client Exiting)
(BaconStation) somewhere in the universe, a Norm also quits IRC.

...he sent me the following link (which Ben probably already knows, since I think it's just the book pages posted online). Bunny suicides.

Terrible man.


Apparently you guys only comment when I update. What's up with that? :)

Anyhow, nothing much to say right now -- a little too late for my brain to actually be functioning at any level approaching respectability. Suffice it to say that I greatly enjoy having friends that I can cuddle with, one after another, or several at a time. I love having friends that provide me with backrubs, or who appreciate receiving backrubs in return, and I love having friends that are willing to indulge my desire to cuddle or provide cuddles just because. I love having friends that tell you about the various outfits that they've pictured you in -- in the 'dirty' sense -- and friends that make bargains with you about revealing secrets in exchange for you dropping your pants.

I also love sex. But that's another matter entirely.


Sorry I've been neglecting you, my little blog. I have been a bad mommy.

In my defence, I’ve been busy like crazy monkeys the last little while. And sort of not. I’m having to force myself to get back into the writing habit, for I have fallen out of it and that makes me sad. I really want to go somewhere with writing, and apparently, if you don’t actually *write*, that’s kinda hard to do.

So, the solution? To buy a PS2 and have even more things that keep me from the computer. Yes, that is tonight’s plan, post gym – I’m finally going to get off my ass and buy a gaming console. I blame JW, and I’ve already told him that; there have been too many times that I’ve played cool video games at his place (or other friends’ homes, too), and sucked royally at them, so now I want them for myself, at my house.

Let’s see, the week in brief overview... Well, Tuesday night and Wednesday after the gym were spent reading for book club. This month’s selection was The Birth of Venus, by Sarah Dunnant. I found that I enjoyed it a fair bit – not a book I would have picked up off the shelves and read myself, but after all, that’s why I joined a book club, to be forced out of my comfortable little book niches and into other options. Next is Balthasar’s Odyssey, but I haven’t started it yet. I figure I should read it with more than 4 days to go this time. :)

Thursday night was a gaming session over at R’s place, and it was a geeky dumb evening. Nothing more shall be said, especially nothing that pertains to bathroom jokes (not what you’re thinking). Friday night I had my first book club meeting, and it was pretty fun. So far it’s a group of just girls, though apparently a boy will be joining next month. None of us have a problem with that, but we figure we may not spend 45+ minutes talking about childbirth if there are boys hanging around. *grin*

Afterwards, we met up at Greg and Madeleine’s place and watched Gypsy 83. Interesting movie, definitely. There’s a scene where the lead actress takes her top off, and you see her breasts in their entirety. We were all fairly quiet for a moment or two, then the comments started – wow, that poor girl, that sort of thing. There was nothing wrong with her breasts, they were very attractive, they were just also very large. And we figured possibly rather uncomfortable, but at least they were all natural, which I feel usually beats out fake. At least, I like what I’ve got, and that’s the most important thing.

Saturday Ben and his gf came over and we did a bit of library-ing of the book collection. After they left, I finished the books in the living room and did the DVD/VHS collection, too. Then I got together with R and N at their place, joined after awhile by JW and AM, and we played a game called the Totally Renamed Spy Game and then Zombies. Both card-type games, both goofy and fun. :)

Sunday was just lounging about – I put my plans to buy a PS2 on hold and tried phoning around instead. That’s going to be tonight’s post-gym plan. When I was at the station, I talked for awhile to the awesome cool news chick and then got a bit more precision as to the current boy situation. PDB came to the station to drive me home, then he came in for a bit and I wound up explaining to him that I wanted nothing more to do with dating. Well, first I said it in the car, and then I explained it in more detail at my place. He was more upset about it than I would’ve thought, but I think things between us will be fine – he’s taking me out PS2-shopping tonight, and we’re still going to the movie tomorrow night (though if I don’t sleep well again tonight, I might call that off, we’ll see).

It’s kinda nice to have that sorted out, at least.

I also spoke to Moose on the phone, and we’re getting together for coffee on Wednesday, after the gym. I’m curious about what’s going to come out of that.

This week is a crazy one. I’m double-booked every evening this week, and I have to leave work a bit early on Friday to accommodate a massage I’m going to get – my neck and back are somewhat screwed up, and I want to try to see if a massage will sort it out. If not, I might try a chiropractic treatment. We shall see.

For now, time to escape to the gym and money spending... but if you’ve made it this far, go read my story!


It amuses me how often I inadvertantly and subconciously wind up matching my underwear to whatever top I happen to be wearing that day. Every single time it's happened, it's been completely by chance, and I don't wind up realizing it until at least halfway through the day.

Somewhere, somehow, I'm partly fashion conscious, I guess.


Btw, there are issues with the hosting company through which Gord set up the redirection for me... so to access the WB, you have to use http://drunkenwhore.blogspot.com if you want to get to the site.

And you want to get to the site.
Stupid IE windows closing for *no* good reason... means once again this week, I've lost a sizeable blog update. *grrr*

Here's the conversation Shawn and I had earlier today. The context is more or less there;

Me: PLUS, because life is IRONIC, this week I have started setting my alarm later so I can sleep in more... only to be woken up before my alarm USED to go off, by the FUCKING SNOWPLOW removing tonnes of I DON'T KNOW WHAT right beside my WINDOW
Me: RANDOM word capitalization IS fun
Shawn: Maybe they're plowing hobos?
Me: Fucking hobos, taking up the driveway space
Shawn: I know! Can't they just find an abaondoned train or somethin' somethin' like all of the other self-respecting vagrants?!
Me: Apparently not. Oh, no, they have to live next to me, in my posh upscale little place, and then cause all sorts of problems when the plows have to come along at 6:00 in the morning to squash them down, and quell their rebellious nature! Fucking hobo uprising!
Shawn: Quote of the Day: "Fucking hobo uprising!"
Me: I'm liking it, and I'm glad it makes me seem heartless.
Shawn: Yay!
Shawn: Even though no one is in there--*weeps!*--I changed the topic in #ICQ to "Fucking hobo uprising!" =D

Then I cracked trying to spell FUCKING COCK in reference to a situation at work. Then I went on to talk about feminism vs. respectfulness and so on, but I can't be bothered to try to type it back out. I'm not sure how well-written it was anyhow.

In good news, though, I've been told I have casual status at work until end of fiscal year, and at a slightly higher pay than I was making before I got stuck in agency hell (and even more than I was making while in agency hell). Yay for employment. :)


Jen: *flex*

I am sorry, I am dull today.
Shawn: Me too. =/
Jen: Umm... so, I hear that you have a fuzzy bum.
Shawn: It's awesome! It keeps all the children warm.
Shawn: Okay, I've officially scared myself in less than ONE SENTENCE>

A small portion of my day today.

I've decided that I want to get a PS2. I've finally been sucked in, and all because of games like Karaoke Revolution, Dance Dance Revolution, and Amplitude. At least they're useful games, or something. So, who wants to buy them for me?

Yes, I played Karaoke Revolution the other day, over at JW and AM's place. I had sworn I wouldn't torment people with my singing voice, but I did, and I wasn't that awful at all. But see, KR gives you a misguided sense of confidence -- you may be able to hit and/or sustain the notes, and so on, but you may still not sound good. That's me -- I can eventually find the notes, I just don't really sound good while I'm doing it. No matter, I had fun. And I learned that Madeleine has a really pretty singing voice -- I'd never heard her sing solo before, and it was really nice to listen to.

I also learned an important lesson about singing Britney Spears songs; if you mess up the lyric or section once, don't worry, you'll get another 4 or 5 chances to get it right.

I did some punches on my heavy bag on Saturday. I can really get the thing rattling and moving, so I figure I'm just getting back and the noisy upstairs neighbours. Hah! I really do need plates for it, though. :P

Well, I thought I had more to say, but it's getting towards the end of the day -- I have to leave a bit early, 'cause I moved my gym appointment up to accomodate my dinner date tonight.

I'd originally jokingly said I was going to make a list of the names of boys I've dated for any length of time (say, 3 dates or more), and try to avoid those this year -- maybe start dating the alphabet, as another friend of mine has jokingly said she'd done in the past. Tonight's dinner date, my soul mate/stalking victim (running jokes), shares the name of the One Big Love ex- boyfriend. Maybe I'm just starting over from the top? Weird. :)

For the record, the name and some very basic characteristics are all they seem to share in common at this point. I'm not trying to date my exes' dopplegangers. That would just be *bad*, since it would mean that next I'd have to spend 3 years of my life with a psychologically abusive asshole. Been there, done that -- got the mental scars. No thanks.


Okay, so they're not as cute as my beasts, but they're still pretty cute.

And this is pretty cool.


I hate my friends.

OFK: We still on for shopping?
Jen: Yup -- I was going to call you, actually. :) I'm going to be here for a little bit still, but I don't have to go to the gym, so... it works out.
OFK: okay, let me know when you're ready to meet. And where you'd like to meet. And whether you'd like to eat.
Jen: And if I enjoy meat? If milk comes from a cow's teat? If I need to take a seat?
OFK: Wheat.
Jen: Bleat.
OFK: Feat of Feet.
Jen: Elite. 1337
OFK: Parrakeet.
Jen: Parakeet, actually.

OFK: Uh... I looked up the spelling of parrakeet before sending it... I didn't cheat.
OFK: In fact, it would appear that either spelling is complete.
Jen: Then this is neat:
OFK: Feel the heat: http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=parrakeet
Jen: I'm tired. I feel beat.
OFK: Awww, my poor little sweet...
Jen: Two nights of annoying conversation styles... Are you and Jay trying to compete?
Jen: brb-eet.
OFK: LOL, okay, you can win with that. :) I hope this won't fill you with conceit.
Jen: I am truly modest and always a treat.
OFK: I'm just annoyed that I can't call you a teat, 'cause you already used teat. Teat. :P
Jen: You = loser.
Jen: Hah!
OFK: I had already admitted defeat...
Jen: But yet you continue the streak.
OFK: You haven't yet told me where and when we'll meet.
Jen: As usual -- Rideau Street. :)
OFK: When you get there, give my cell phone a tweet.
Jen: Tweedle-eedle-eet.
OFK: Teat. :)


Note to self: never send Jay quotes from bash.org when they deal with haikus.

Jay's first haiku? Sent at 15:28:23. My last one? 16:52:22. Gah.

Jen: 3y3 4m l33t h4x0r
j0! 3y3 4m t4lking to j00!
fux0red 5cr1pt k1dd13.
-"l33t h41ku"

Jay: Very nice. :)
Jay: Haiku-off!

Jen: I thought you'd enjoy it.

I didn't write it!

Jay: It is so cold here
That my nipples have frozen
to my undershirt...

Jen: I didn't want to
know about your nipple-shirt
Thanks for sharing, Jay.

Jay: I thought my nipples,
through their immaculate form,
enthralled your sharp mind.

Jay: Perhaps you would spit,
on the mona lisa or
burn the Voice of Fire.

Jen: Your nipples frighten
Small children, animals, and
me alike. Sorry.

Jay: Like so much great art,
they're unappreciated
by those with no taste.

Jen: I'm not sure that your
girlfriend Natasha would want
many tasting them

Jay: Before I hang them
in an art gallery, I
should wax my teet hairs.

Jen: I am broken now
That image is burned into
my brain. I go hurl.

Jay: I'll end your pain now,
before this poem devolves
to shaving my bum.

Jen: If you go to shave
Your hind end, don't forget to
include your back, too.

Jay: I'll order up two,
When they're done with my rear end,
They'll shave your top lip. ;)

Jen: But the boys I date
Like the hair on my top lip --
Tickles when I fellate.

Jay: That's quite disturbing.
Do they also beg you to
dress up like Hitler?

Jen: No, that is only
Your fantasy. Most guys like
Me just fine as is.

Jay: Those close-minded guys,
are probably boring shags,
Nazi sex is hot!

Jen: This exchange is going
to be excellent fodder
for my site you know.

Jay: I'm not that worried,
After all, Jen, it's not like
anyone reads it.

Jen: You is a bitch and
you're just jealous because my
site owns yours. Hardcore.

Jay: Oooh, Diss! Feel that burn!
Tonight you'll cry to your mum,
While I wax my breasts.

Jen: Whatever floats your
boat, my strange, weird, Jay-friend.
Go love your chest hair.

Jay: I thought I told you...
Never call me that again!
I go by "Phreeeeeoooouuummm" now!

Jen: You claim to be that,
But we all know otherwise.
One of us needs sleep.

Jay: Phreeeeeoooouuummm sounds like race cars,
so that should be my new name,
because I drink gas. :)

Jen: That explains much of
you and your oddities. Not
that you are explained.

Jay: I find it so hard,
to accept criticism,
from a girl who sucks.

Jen: I have always had
compliments on my sucking
abilities. Hah.

Jay: That doesn't mean much,
He'll say anything when you
have him by the balls.

Jen: That may be true, but
I know I am good, and that's
all that matters. Shoo.

Jay: I won't tease, you're a
rare and great thing, a girl who
loves to give head... wow!

Jay: Haikus becoming,
broken and non-syllabic,
not thinking with brain...

Jay: Why do I feel bad?
it's not rocket science that
my cock writes bad prose.

Jen: That's because they are
venturing into the realm
of head. Distracted.

Jen: This has continued
For over an hour. I am
ready to leave now.

Jen: However, first I
must be declared the winner.
Did I defeat you?

Jay: Your crazy sex talk
has got me all muddled up,
I declare you: Champ.

Jen: I must remind you,
You introduced sex into
the haiku process.

Jay: Leave my tender nips
out of your condemnations,
nothing is as pure.

Jen: Must every haiku
battle center around your
nipples? Move on, Jay!

Jay: Few topics engage,
like my love of my nips, except...
maybe your peircings. ;)

Jen: And so it rages
on. I am going home, taking
my piercings with me.

Jay: The only rage here,
is the surging of my blood,
and my huge hormones. :)

Jen: Nothing on you is huge;
I have heard from Natasha.
Stop your filthy lies!

Jay: Could it really be?
Could her mass astonishment
all have been a ruse?

Jen: Women must cater
to every man's ego. You're
the biggest I've seen, wow!

Jay: Her moans of passion
betray your attempts to jibe,
I am freaking huge!

Jay: No unit of size
is adequate to measure...
my wooly mammoth.

Jen: Oh God, any re-
maining innocence I had
is now gone. You're sad.

Jen: Moans of passion can
be faked, I will remind you.
Harry met Sally?

Jay: Enjoy your walk home,
While facing the wind, just think:
Jay is freezing cold.

Jen: I will laugh at your
Cold Winterpeg home. You chose
to move there, doofus.

Jen: I leave now, crowned Champ.
Suffer the agony of
defeat! Talk later.


Well, the heavy bag is all set up. It didn't take very long, and I only harrassed PDB throughout the entire process. As it turns out, I will need to add weight plates to the bottom of the damn thing, for I can move the stupid structure around when I punch it. I'd also love to secure the bottom of the bag to the stand itself somehow, but there are no ties on the bag... I'd have to figure out some other arrangement.

I could've sworn I had other things to write about here, but bugger if I can remember them.

100 things we didn't know this time last year,, courtesy of Jay, who updates his site occasionally.

I've given up on pretty much my entire blogroll. Of the people on my daily read list, I think that perhaps 2 or *maybe* 3 of them update more than once a millennium. It's time to get all new friends and/or strangers to stalk, I guess.


OMG I updated Whore's Boudoir. Go point out the typos and misused homonyms to me, as some of you revel in doing. :)
I went shopping for my heavy bag stand and boxing equipment yesterday. Started out at Fitness Depot -- they didn't have any in stock, but they said that they were getting some in in two weeks, for $288. I was going to buy a pair of street fighter gloves there (or some other weird name), but they were $100 or so before tax. Nuts to that.

Headed over to Sportchek, where there was a sale going on -- they had stands in stock (all of which sold out in the time between when I bought mine and we got it into the car), so I bought a stand, boxing gloves, skipping rope, and two 3 lb dumbbells (good for warming up the shoulders), for $264 with taxes -- still less than the stand would have cost me at the other place. Suck it, Fitness Depot!

I was there with a friend of mine (some of you may recall the puppy dog), who is 6 feet tall, and built large. He works out, has done martial arts for years, and is a decently bulky guy. The clerk was asking if we had plates at home (like you'd add to a barbell for assorted workouts), and PD said he did. The clerk mentioned he'd probably want to put them on the stand to help balance it out, since PD's a big guy and would likely be making it move somewhat. I stuck up my hand at that point and said that actually, it was for me, and then the clerk said I probably wouldn't need the weights, since I wouldn't likely be moving it as much. PD defended me, and I think I jokingly offered to beat up the clerk. He had a sense of humour, so it was all good. :)

I found the whole exchange funny, 'cause I'd told PD at the start of the excursion that I bet that, with both of us walking into a fitness store for boxing equipment, that any clerk we got would automatically assume the equipment was for him.

We dropped the stand off at my place, when back out to that end of town and got some food, then went over to his place so he could show it off. I razzed him about his porn collection (such as it was), and surprised him somewhat when I said I didn't have one of my own. Now, no one asked about toys or books... Anyhow, after checking out his place, it was off to the parents' place to collect the heavy bag. I met his folks and sister, befriended the pets, and then we went back to my place to move the bag into the apartment.

I learned that he's not allowed to read the directions for anything, so I took over as foreman and got us all tricked out in putting the thing together. We had to run over to Sears to buy a proper-sized socket wrench (those things aren't cheap!), and then decided to carry over today, since I was supposed to meet someone for dessert and was already going to be late.

So, tonight I will have my heavy bag set up and ready for abuse, and I'm looking forward to it. My patience level is currently pretty good, but it will get tested in the next while, I can tell. I'm hoping to put the bag to use in the mornings, instead of lying in bed and sleeping for awhile, or dealing with the kitties.

Speaking of kitties... they are not to be trusted around flowers. Ex-boyfriend J bought the lady folk roses at the bar on Friday night, and my kitties systematically abused mine during the evening and away hours. Even when it was on top of the fridge. My kitties have no romance in their soul... maybe 'cause I took away their girl organs. Ah well.

Let's see, moving backwards through time... New Year's Eve. Went out to the bar with Jay and his girlfriend, ex-boyfriend J, OFK, Greg, Madeleine, and a former coworker of Greg and OFK's. The bouncer, when he was checking my ID, greeted me with, "Hi Jennifer!" to which I replied, "Just Jen, please." Then he said, "Okay, Marie," and I made some comment about us being on close terms, and I think I might've asked what his middle name was. He said his name was Cru, and I couldn't think of anything witty to say, so we moved on to get our party favours. The girls got tiaras with "Happy New Year" written on them, plastic leis and sequeakers, and the guys got "Happy New Year" hats and squeakers.

We managed to snag a table upstairs in the perfect location -- far enough from both stages to not be jostled by dancers or deafened by speakers, and enough seats for all of us. As the night wore on, things got louder and I know I had to talk/yell louder to be able to be heard, but otherwise we were good. Highlights of the evening:

* The aforementioned exchange with the bouncer
* Drinking alot and being convinced that I'd be sick the next day, only to discover that I was perfectly fine in the morning
* Shocking the *crap* out of Jay with a revelation about my past (that in retrospect, was not something he knew, and in fact was likely not something that anyone at the table knew or possibly wanted to know... maybe I was kinda drunk)
* Kissing Jay's girlfriend for free, 'cause she'd kiss me for free!
* Feeling bad that we'd wound up bumping faces/noses and thinking that it wasn't the greatest demonstration of my kissing abilities
* Hearing I had soft lips :)
* The boys trying to convince Madeleine and I to kiss for money (we had the pot up to $40 at the end, but no go)
* Group consensus that champagne (or the champagne given out at the bar) isn't good
* Arm-wrestling Jay twice and being close to winning the second time, but having to cave because I was laughing too much and distracted
* Hearing Greg announce that my biceps "are like, three times the size of Jay's!"

All in all, a fun evening. It's always entertaining when we're out at a bar and OFK is there, 'cause people will buy him shots when they buy rounds, and he passes them to me. I think I must be fun when I'm drinking. ;)

This was the first year that I had actually decided on resolutions, too. They range from the specific to the broad:

1 (for importance): To not allow my self-worth to be determined by others.
2. To get to the gym 3 times a week, as my trainer demands.
3. To write more (i.e., at all).
4. To stop being such a friggin' martyr in my lovelife. So an ex- of mine is pissed off at me and so on -- not much I can do about that if he's not willing to talk to me.
5. To try to start eating better. Hah.

I'll also likely be learning some form of tae kwon do from PD, but that hasn't started yet and isn't necessarily a resolution/goal so much as it is just increased exercise, so it's just here for noting, not resolutioning.

In retrospect, 2004 was kind of a bleah year. There really weren't many major highs to it (well, except for moving and my two kitties), in my vague recollection, and I'm hoping that'll change for 2005. Bring on the James Marsters-lookalikes! Bring on the oiled, naked slave men for sexual purposes! Bring on the hot lovin' along with the courtesy, respect, intelligence and great personality I have come to desire and have certainly earned!


Usually, I have no problems having multiple conversations online. But sometimes, my brain doesn't switch between them very well.


Talking to a coworker about penis size in one conversation (particularly, his and his generous endowment)... not in a flirty sense, just a general information sense. Then, I switch to another window, where I encounter the following line (completely *not* about penis size):

"oh yes. i think mine is the biggest they make anyway"

*blink* *blink*

We were talking about heavy bags, for boxing or martial arts. And yet... hehehe. Dirty.