2003/09/09

Hi.

I am not Jen.

However, in spite of being decidedly not Jen (a harsh reality that keeps me awake at night), I am updating her blog. This is obviously an unprecedented blog-crossover that will shake the information superhighway to its very foundations. Feel free to fall backwards in your chair (assuming you are sitting in one) in a stereotypically-hilarious fashion. For example, extending both arms and waving them frantically as though you were a bird having a seizure would definitely suffice. Once you're back on your feet and have come to accept that a non-Jen is updating Jen's blog, you may continue reading.

I'm sure if Jen were writing this update, she's say something to the effect of: 'I had a shitty day. Although I hung out with my friend Heather (good times for all), I also got into a bit of a fight with my father/parents that left me in tears and in a sour mood. My cold is also very sickness-causing at the moment, which is certainly non-good times. I am also a loser because ninety-nine percent of the time, it's difficult for my fans (Shawn being a prime example) to leave me encouraging comments due to the fact that that portion of my site is perpetually down and pathetic and stupid. I'm also inexplicably attracted to John Lovitz, and felt that I should finally come clean. Oh, and speaking of Shawn: Meatforbabies.org is, in fact, the bizomb. It's actually more akin to the mizzother of bizzombs, if I may be so bold. Sometimes I run into walls as though I were mad, simply because I'm frustrated at how hot his website is!'

And her entry would go on like that, but I'm sure you get the gist.

Actually, if you've managed to read through this piece of nonsensical writing, I was wondering if you could do me a favour. If you are able to leave a comment, leave one reminding Jen that she is, in fact, the coolest person EVAAAARRRR. After all, she doesn't seem to appreciate that she's all up ons when it comes to being a cool and modern chick, which is unfortunate. Oh, and if the comment-thingy is still fuckzored, you are hereby ordered to tell Jen how awesome she is at the next available opportunity (like when the commenty-thingy is a-workin', for example).

And so ends the momentous non-Jen update. Life is confusing and stressful not only for me, but for pretty much everyone else I currently know. Jen is no exception to this trend, you see, and I'm sure once her computer isn't being as much of an ass-jerk, you'll hear all about it in exquisite detail. =)

I josh because I love!

-Shawn

No comments: