2003/06/01
Tales from the evening:
I ran around, late as usual, to get ready for the wedding. Got the contacts in, dress on, makeup done, ran off. Managed to turn the wrong way coming off the highway, so I had to tear back around, find parking, then run into the church. Luckily I got there just before the ceremony started, so I didn't interrupt anything.
The ceremony itself was really sweet; I found myself tearing up a few times. I didn't get to see too much of it, 'cause I'm wee and I was near the back, but it sounded very nice. :)
After that, we (the invited), stood outside and shivered a little while everyone did pictures inside. Many of the men did the manly thing and offered up their jackets to us underdressed ladies, so I sported Jay's jacket a few times during the day; unfortunately the weather wasn't the most cooperative. It was a little cold and drizzly, but it didn't out and out pour, so that was good.
Jay and I drove towards the reception area, but stopped in at a mall to have a snack. We chatted a bit about wedding stuff, and I was saying that I wished Greg and Madeleine the best and kinda hoped for something similar for myself. Then, very shortly after we arrived at the reception, JJ, one of the other members of the group, told me no one would ever marry me. So, it was a warm and fuzzy day.
We all stood around and chatted with one another, nibbling on hors d'oeuvres while we waited for the bride and groom to arrive. Once they did, it was fairly soon after that that we sat down for dinner. The emcee announced that the priest was going to say a blessing and grace before we at, and as he stood up to do so, I noticed a spider inching along the tablecloth towards me. I gave a little yelp and cowered in the corner, as far from the table as I could manage (about a foot or two away). Jay and my other seatmate looked after spider disposal, and I was safe to return. Of course, what with the timing and all, it was thought that I was really opposed to grace, but the story was all explained and laughed over later.
As I sat down to dinner, I pulled out my cell phone and noticed that I'd received two calls; one from D, and the second from my house. I thought the call from home was weird, as my parents knew that I'd be out all night, but I thought perhaps something from work had come up (as they'd tried to get me to come in today), so I checked the message. I couldn't hear much of what D's message was, since the ambient noise in the room had picked up somewhat, but I could hear enough of the second message to run out of the room -- my sister had called saying that friends of the family had been in a car accident in Newfoundland, and that the father, Mike, was killed.
I started crying immediately, even though I wasn't entirely sure I'd heard correctly, and all I could say was, "Oh my God," over and over again. I called home and no one answered, so I called my dad's cell. I asked him if I'd heard right, and he said yes, and I squeaked out, "Dad, that's awful" and probably another "Oh my God," and he didn't say anything until he said, "here, talk to your mother" and passed the phone over.
Mom told me a few more bits, I cried and said some more, "Oh my Gods," and after we hung up I sat downstairs and cried for a bit more. They were asking me what my plans were, and telling me not to drive if I was upset; they said I should take a cab home and leave the car there if necessary. I said I was going to stay through dinner, or at least as much of it as I could, and they were on their way to pick up the two daughters that are in town right now and bring them here.
I went into the washroom to clean up, and a lady was there changing her baby. She asked if I was okay (I had to chuckle a little at the fact that I had mascara streaks down my cheeks), and I said I'd just gotten some bad news, but I was okay and thank you.
I went upstairs and Jay asked if I wanted to go for a walk, so I got my purse and wandered off and told him. We walked and talked for a few minutes before returning to the reception, where we ate and chatted with the rest of our table. I had a few wobbly moments, but I held on through the dinner and speeches, then headed home.
I stayed because I wanted to be around friends for awhile, and maybe just pretend it hadn't happened, as immature as that may be. I didn't know what to say or do once I got home, and I know that's really common in situations like this -- no one knows how to act, so they don't say anything and people feel bad and it's all a mess. By the time I got home, everyone seemed to be holding on okay, and poor E was fielding one long distance call after another, talking to people and hearing their sympathies (I imagine) and so on.
We sat downstairs and watched "A Guy Thing," which is actually a really bad movie, but it gave us all something to focus on for awhile. I feel somewhat out of sorts, and not sure how to act; Mike and his wife and my parents have been friends for longer than us kids have been in the picture, and we've all grown up together, albeit in a distant sort of way -- they live in Nova Scotia, and we don't. Annual vacations unfailingly involved time spent together, and we've gone camping in Prince Edward Island twice together. Whenever one of our families needed a place to stay or a helping hand, we were there for each other, and Mike is... was... the most generous and helpful person I've known. I'd count on him as a second dad, and if there was anyone that I could imagine not being there, it wouldn't have been him.
He and my dad were going to photograph my cousin's wedding together, and I know my dad was really psyched about it. I was looking forward to seeing him. He has... had this huge booming laugh, and he used to love to take shots at me and my sister and he'd laugh himself silly when we managed to riff them off of him or Dad. He was the first one to hear about J and I breaking up, and he just gave me a big hug and rubbed my back. At the dinner table that night, when his wife was a little surprised at the fact that I wasn't as enthusiastic about J's great qualities when she was discussing them, he just gave me a sympathetic, understanding look.
I feel weird in a way about being upset. I don't want to tell everyone what's going on and make them feel all bad -- that's why I didn't tell Greg and Madeleine that I was leaving, or why (R's sister said she'd make sure they knew). I didn't want to spoil their big day, and I figured I wouldn't really be missed. I know the way that group talks that everyone would find out sooner or later :), but it wasn't necessary to make a big deal. I want people to know, so they can understand if I seem weird, but I don't want to say, in case they feel bad. I also feel like it's not nearly as much *my* bad to feel; as important as Mike was to my family and I, he wasn't my dad, so I don't have a right to feel as bad? It doesn't make sense.
So... yeah. That's where things stand right now. I'm sorry this entry is depressing, though I know it didn't start out that way -- I'm just taking you through the progression that was my day. I'm still sad, and in a way writing this hasn't helped (me feel unsad), although it's the easiest way to inform everyone without having to explain it all. This is just my way of dealing with grief; crying, and writing. I wound up talking to E (the boy) on the phone for about two hours last night, which helped somewhat. It was nice to just think of other things and be stupid. Poor E was having to carry most of the conversation, since I was pretty exhausted and not very interesting, but at times I perked up and was more part of the conversation.
Anyhow... going to try to have a slightly more up day today. I thought I might take the day off from work, but I think working will actually be good. If nothing else, it'll give me something to complain about. :)
I ran around, late as usual, to get ready for the wedding. Got the contacts in, dress on, makeup done, ran off. Managed to turn the wrong way coming off the highway, so I had to tear back around, find parking, then run into the church. Luckily I got there just before the ceremony started, so I didn't interrupt anything.
The ceremony itself was really sweet; I found myself tearing up a few times. I didn't get to see too much of it, 'cause I'm wee and I was near the back, but it sounded very nice. :)
After that, we (the invited), stood outside and shivered a little while everyone did pictures inside. Many of the men did the manly thing and offered up their jackets to us underdressed ladies, so I sported Jay's jacket a few times during the day; unfortunately the weather wasn't the most cooperative. It was a little cold and drizzly, but it didn't out and out pour, so that was good.
Jay and I drove towards the reception area, but stopped in at a mall to have a snack. We chatted a bit about wedding stuff, and I was saying that I wished Greg and Madeleine the best and kinda hoped for something similar for myself. Then, very shortly after we arrived at the reception, JJ, one of the other members of the group, told me no one would ever marry me. So, it was a warm and fuzzy day.
We all stood around and chatted with one another, nibbling on hors d'oeuvres while we waited for the bride and groom to arrive. Once they did, it was fairly soon after that that we sat down for dinner. The emcee announced that the priest was going to say a blessing and grace before we at, and as he stood up to do so, I noticed a spider inching along the tablecloth towards me. I gave a little yelp and cowered in the corner, as far from the table as I could manage (about a foot or two away). Jay and my other seatmate looked after spider disposal, and I was safe to return. Of course, what with the timing and all, it was thought that I was really opposed to grace, but the story was all explained and laughed over later.
As I sat down to dinner, I pulled out my cell phone and noticed that I'd received two calls; one from D, and the second from my house. I thought the call from home was weird, as my parents knew that I'd be out all night, but I thought perhaps something from work had come up (as they'd tried to get me to come in today), so I checked the message. I couldn't hear much of what D's message was, since the ambient noise in the room had picked up somewhat, but I could hear enough of the second message to run out of the room -- my sister had called saying that friends of the family had been in a car accident in Newfoundland, and that the father, Mike, was killed.
I started crying immediately, even though I wasn't entirely sure I'd heard correctly, and all I could say was, "Oh my God," over and over again. I called home and no one answered, so I called my dad's cell. I asked him if I'd heard right, and he said yes, and I squeaked out, "Dad, that's awful" and probably another "Oh my God," and he didn't say anything until he said, "here, talk to your mother" and passed the phone over.
Mom told me a few more bits, I cried and said some more, "Oh my Gods," and after we hung up I sat downstairs and cried for a bit more. They were asking me what my plans were, and telling me not to drive if I was upset; they said I should take a cab home and leave the car there if necessary. I said I was going to stay through dinner, or at least as much of it as I could, and they were on their way to pick up the two daughters that are in town right now and bring them here.
I went into the washroom to clean up, and a lady was there changing her baby. She asked if I was okay (I had to chuckle a little at the fact that I had mascara streaks down my cheeks), and I said I'd just gotten some bad news, but I was okay and thank you.
I went upstairs and Jay asked if I wanted to go for a walk, so I got my purse and wandered off and told him. We walked and talked for a few minutes before returning to the reception, where we ate and chatted with the rest of our table. I had a few wobbly moments, but I held on through the dinner and speeches, then headed home.
I stayed because I wanted to be around friends for awhile, and maybe just pretend it hadn't happened, as immature as that may be. I didn't know what to say or do once I got home, and I know that's really common in situations like this -- no one knows how to act, so they don't say anything and people feel bad and it's all a mess. By the time I got home, everyone seemed to be holding on okay, and poor E was fielding one long distance call after another, talking to people and hearing their sympathies (I imagine) and so on.
We sat downstairs and watched "A Guy Thing," which is actually a really bad movie, but it gave us all something to focus on for awhile. I feel somewhat out of sorts, and not sure how to act; Mike and his wife and my parents have been friends for longer than us kids have been in the picture, and we've all grown up together, albeit in a distant sort of way -- they live in Nova Scotia, and we don't. Annual vacations unfailingly involved time spent together, and we've gone camping in Prince Edward Island twice together. Whenever one of our families needed a place to stay or a helping hand, we were there for each other, and Mike is... was... the most generous and helpful person I've known. I'd count on him as a second dad, and if there was anyone that I could imagine not being there, it wouldn't have been him.
He and my dad were going to photograph my cousin's wedding together, and I know my dad was really psyched about it. I was looking forward to seeing him. He has... had this huge booming laugh, and he used to love to take shots at me and my sister and he'd laugh himself silly when we managed to riff them off of him or Dad. He was the first one to hear about J and I breaking up, and he just gave me a big hug and rubbed my back. At the dinner table that night, when his wife was a little surprised at the fact that I wasn't as enthusiastic about J's great qualities when she was discussing them, he just gave me a sympathetic, understanding look.
I feel weird in a way about being upset. I don't want to tell everyone what's going on and make them feel all bad -- that's why I didn't tell Greg and Madeleine that I was leaving, or why (R's sister said she'd make sure they knew). I didn't want to spoil their big day, and I figured I wouldn't really be missed. I know the way that group talks that everyone would find out sooner or later :), but it wasn't necessary to make a big deal. I want people to know, so they can understand if I seem weird, but I don't want to say, in case they feel bad. I also feel like it's not nearly as much *my* bad to feel; as important as Mike was to my family and I, he wasn't my dad, so I don't have a right to feel as bad? It doesn't make sense.
So... yeah. That's where things stand right now. I'm sorry this entry is depressing, though I know it didn't start out that way -- I'm just taking you through the progression that was my day. I'm still sad, and in a way writing this hasn't helped (me feel unsad), although it's the easiest way to inform everyone without having to explain it all. This is just my way of dealing with grief; crying, and writing. I wound up talking to E (the boy) on the phone for about two hours last night, which helped somewhat. It was nice to just think of other things and be stupid. Poor E was having to carry most of the conversation, since I was pretty exhausted and not very interesting, but at times I perked up and was more part of the conversation.
Anyhow... going to try to have a slightly more up day today. I thought I might take the day off from work, but I think working will actually be good. If nothing else, it'll give me something to complain about. :)
2003/05/31
I swear to *God*, sometimes I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I spent half the morning racing around downtown and then one particular outskirt, trying desperately to find a clip to help gather my dress in at the waist. I looked this morning and couldn't find the one I'd bought years ago; I checked all of the clothes I might've used it on, I checked my pyjama drawer, where things of that nature congregate to hide and tell stories of me, and no luck.
I finally bought suspender clips at Bouclair and was going to improvise something using hair jewelry or a choker.
I decided to do one last scan through my pyjama drawer, just on the off chance I might find something useful, as well as to look for the hair accessory I was going to use.
What do I find?
The fucking clip.
Everyone know the Edvard Munch painting The Scream? That's about how I feel right now.
That, and there's something rotten in the state of Denmark, and it's Digger. He's taken to hunting young rabbits -- I think we have a nest underneath one of our bushes on the front lawn, 'cause I saw him circling and meowing at it, but I couldn't see anything so I let him be. Then he turned up in the backyard with a fresh kill and was showing it off to Shadow, who didn't seem too impressed -- she turned up at the backdoor howling to be let in.
I also saw a cat smooshed through the onramp of the highway I took to get downtown this morning, as well as lots of other poor, unfortunate souls -- i.e. squirrels. This is not a good day for the animals.
On the plus side, I got all the wrapping and card I need for Greg and Mad's wedding, I don't have to work, I'm tired (okay, not a plus), but it turns out the wedding is at 3, not 2; this gives me more time to get ready, which is good.
Which is what I ought to be doing right now, I just thought I'd share my frustration at the accessories that mock me. See why I don't do girly? Twice I've lost my red lipstick (two different ones; I bought a replacement that's also disappeared), and my accessories hide from me. This is not encouraging me to be girly.
I spent half the morning racing around downtown and then one particular outskirt, trying desperately to find a clip to help gather my dress in at the waist. I looked this morning and couldn't find the one I'd bought years ago; I checked all of the clothes I might've used it on, I checked my pyjama drawer, where things of that nature congregate to hide and tell stories of me, and no luck.
I finally bought suspender clips at Bouclair and was going to improvise something using hair jewelry or a choker.
I decided to do one last scan through my pyjama drawer, just on the off chance I might find something useful, as well as to look for the hair accessory I was going to use.
What do I find?
The fucking clip.
Everyone know the Edvard Munch painting The Scream? That's about how I feel right now.
That, and there's something rotten in the state of Denmark, and it's Digger. He's taken to hunting young rabbits -- I think we have a nest underneath one of our bushes on the front lawn, 'cause I saw him circling and meowing at it, but I couldn't see anything so I let him be. Then he turned up in the backyard with a fresh kill and was showing it off to Shadow, who didn't seem too impressed -- she turned up at the backdoor howling to be let in.
I also saw a cat smooshed through the onramp of the highway I took to get downtown this morning, as well as lots of other poor, unfortunate souls -- i.e. squirrels. This is not a good day for the animals.
On the plus side, I got all the wrapping and card I need for Greg and Mad's wedding, I don't have to work, I'm tired (okay, not a plus), but it turns out the wedding is at 3, not 2; this gives me more time to get ready, which is good.
Which is what I ought to be doing right now, I just thought I'd share my frustration at the accessories that mock me. See why I don't do girly? Twice I've lost my red lipstick (two different ones; I bought a replacement that's also disappeared), and my accessories hide from me. This is not encouraging me to be girly.
This one required posting:
YOU RAN OVER A SMALL CHILD AND LEFT HIM TO DIE!!!
what's YOUR deepest secret?
brought to you by Quizilla
YOU RAN OVER A SMALL CHILD AND LEFT HIM TO DIE!!!
what's YOUR deepest secret?
brought to you by Quizilla
2003/05/30
New article up at Whore's Boudoir. I'll have another up after the weekend; it's already half-written.
2003/05/29
Of the opinion that I am hated by certain people who I considered to be close friends because they (he?) haven't(hasn't) spoken to me in quite some time now.
Also afraid to bring it up. :P
Stupid life choices.
Just because it's all bleak on here doesn't mean that the happy doesn't happen; in reverse, just because it seems all happy and stupid on here doesn't mean the bleak doesn't happen.
There be thoughts and sadness and regrets and other such that just doesn't make it here, sometimes.
Now I'm off to bed. I bought a dress today. It is pretty, I think. I wasn't really in the mood to shop; there was too much backpack hauling around. :P
What else? 'Twas a pretty quiet day all around. D and I had lunch in a diner, and I saw the crazy bearded lady sitting at the counter, having a beer. When we left the diner, she approached us (on the street), and asked for money "to buy a coffee." Uh... no way. Crazy bums.
Ah well, tomorrow is the scary appointment. I'll be writing about it in article form, which is why nothing has appeared on here about it. After that is work, then watching a video of D in a production of Rocky Horror -- as well as a rickshaw driver, actually. D and I were walking to the mall when he was hailed, and it turns out the rickshaw driver played Brad in the production, so I'll get to see a virtual stranger in undies.
Yes, this is me; I'll be sure to make an inappropriate comment about it next time I see him, if I recognize him. I'm a brat. :)
I forgot to mention before; E bought me a nice journal for writing in. It's campy in a cool way, and has on the front "she did not know whether to use her powers for good or evil." There are also little bits of comments inside, things like, "he deserved to be tortured" or something -- it's in my backpack, so I can't look just yet. That makes the second person in the last six months to buy me a writing book, and I think that's really awesome. It says to me that people notice that I write a lot (as anyone who happens to read anything I post online already can attest), and it shows that they place value in my writing. It makes me feel good.
Also afraid to bring it up. :P
Stupid life choices.
Just because it's all bleak on here doesn't mean that the happy doesn't happen; in reverse, just because it seems all happy and stupid on here doesn't mean the bleak doesn't happen.
There be thoughts and sadness and regrets and other such that just doesn't make it here, sometimes.
Now I'm off to bed. I bought a dress today. It is pretty, I think. I wasn't really in the mood to shop; there was too much backpack hauling around. :P
What else? 'Twas a pretty quiet day all around. D and I had lunch in a diner, and I saw the crazy bearded lady sitting at the counter, having a beer. When we left the diner, she approached us (on the street), and asked for money "to buy a coffee." Uh... no way. Crazy bums.
Ah well, tomorrow is the scary appointment. I'll be writing about it in article form, which is why nothing has appeared on here about it. After that is work, then watching a video of D in a production of Rocky Horror -- as well as a rickshaw driver, actually. D and I were walking to the mall when he was hailed, and it turns out the rickshaw driver played Brad in the production, so I'll get to see a virtual stranger in undies.
Yes, this is me; I'll be sure to make an inappropriate comment about it next time I see him, if I recognize him. I'm a brat. :)
I forgot to mention before; E bought me a nice journal for writing in. It's campy in a cool way, and has on the front "she did not know whether to use her powers for good or evil." There are also little bits of comments inside, things like, "he deserved to be tortured" or something -- it's in my backpack, so I can't look just yet. That makes the second person in the last six months to buy me a writing book, and I think that's really awesome. It says to me that people notice that I write a lot (as anyone who happens to read anything I post online already can attest), and it shows that they place value in my writing. It makes me feel good.
2003/05/28
Gah. Still tired. My life sucks. :)
I hung out with Gord -- or as I like to call him now, Glord -- and Shawn. We got the mad dinners, I had lots of drinks, and then we went on the roof of the mall and drank some more. 'Cause we're fucking classy, that's right.
In more detail: I still say they didn't seat us at the restaurant for awhile 'cause we were explaining to Glord the female anatomy, and how it is that the head of the cock doesn't really rub against the clit during intercourse. It can, but in the midst of the all the thrusting and pumping, it's not a typical thing.
Our waiter was funny, although I don't remember entirely why. He made fun of us drinking girly drinks (okay, me drinking a girly drink), but that thing had mad amounts of booze to it -- I was pretty tipsy after one. Then I had another and kinda sobered up (I think having the food in me helped at that point, too).
Glord and I stole Saddam Hussein's fries, and we acted all stupid and fun. Afterwards, it was to the roof of the mall for sharing swigs of Zambucca, which we all decided we didn't really like that much.
From there, we drew on Shawn's chest and Glord carved him a tattoo and smelled his belly lint (oh yeah, all the secrets are coming out now, suckers!). There was much discussion of Shawn's cock, which Glord poked a few times, and tried to get me to put my hand down his pants. I summed mighty reserves of strength and resisted. :)
There was a funny quote, lemme dig it out... Ah yes, "Why is my penis the centre of the universe?" I think it was a complaint, but it's hard to tell.
I really had to use the washroom, so we wandered into the mall, where I promptly slipped down a stair and hurt my ankle. Despite the comments about me being drunk, I was muchly sober at that point. We hobbled to the bathrooms, where I could hear Shawn and Glord talking the whole time, and then we went to Starfucks for me to get a chocolate drink. Which I drank and enjoyed.
Then I annoyed D a bit and headed over to E's to annoy him. This is my life; annoying people. :)
All of the above takes us to today, where I'm filling time at work until I can go shopping for a dress for the wedding and some more work clothes; I want to get some more shirts that are within dress code regulations (*roll*), and perhaps a skirt or two that I can wear at work. My works pants are somewhat warm for summer wear, and skirts are more fun.
Tonight will involve heading over to R and N's for hanging out. I'm so double-booked for plans this week, it's insane. So many people I want to hang out with, especially before I head off, and so little time. It's fun, but tonight really has to involve sleep, or I may kill someone just to see them die.
I mean, I may fall asleep at work. Sorry, don't know what that could've been. :)
Ah yes, and E has developed a new way to make fun of me/annoy me (and when I say annoy, I actually mean it does somewhat bug me and I might bring it up): to annoy, he interrupts me when I'm midstory. People do that to me all the time, and it makes me feel like I'm boring them or they don't care what I have to say.
To mock, especially when I'm in a long story or concluding one, he says the Simpsons line about Grandpa saying, "so I took the ferry to Shelbyville and I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time..." and so on. He finds it hilarious. *grr*
And today is ghetto 70's underwear today. Shake it, baby!
I hung out with Gord -- or as I like to call him now, Glord -- and Shawn. We got the mad dinners, I had lots of drinks, and then we went on the roof of the mall and drank some more. 'Cause we're fucking classy, that's right.
In more detail: I still say they didn't seat us at the restaurant for awhile 'cause we were explaining to Glord the female anatomy, and how it is that the head of the cock doesn't really rub against the clit during intercourse. It can, but in the midst of the all the thrusting and pumping, it's not a typical thing.
Our waiter was funny, although I don't remember entirely why. He made fun of us drinking girly drinks (okay, me drinking a girly drink), but that thing had mad amounts of booze to it -- I was pretty tipsy after one. Then I had another and kinda sobered up (I think having the food in me helped at that point, too).
Glord and I stole Saddam Hussein's fries, and we acted all stupid and fun. Afterwards, it was to the roof of the mall for sharing swigs of Zambucca, which we all decided we didn't really like that much.
From there, we drew on Shawn's chest and Glord carved him a tattoo and smelled his belly lint (oh yeah, all the secrets are coming out now, suckers!). There was much discussion of Shawn's cock, which Glord poked a few times, and tried to get me to put my hand down his pants. I summed mighty reserves of strength and resisted. :)
There was a funny quote, lemme dig it out... Ah yes, "Why is my penis the centre of the universe?" I think it was a complaint, but it's hard to tell.
I really had to use the washroom, so we wandered into the mall, where I promptly slipped down a stair and hurt my ankle. Despite the comments about me being drunk, I was muchly sober at that point. We hobbled to the bathrooms, where I could hear Shawn and Glord talking the whole time, and then we went to Starfucks for me to get a chocolate drink. Which I drank and enjoyed.
Then I annoyed D a bit and headed over to E's to annoy him. This is my life; annoying people. :)
All of the above takes us to today, where I'm filling time at work until I can go shopping for a dress for the wedding and some more work clothes; I want to get some more shirts that are within dress code regulations (*roll*), and perhaps a skirt or two that I can wear at work. My works pants are somewhat warm for summer wear, and skirts are more fun.
Tonight will involve heading over to R and N's for hanging out. I'm so double-booked for plans this week, it's insane. So many people I want to hang out with, especially before I head off, and so little time. It's fun, but tonight really has to involve sleep, or I may kill someone just to see them die.
I mean, I may fall asleep at work. Sorry, don't know what that could've been. :)
Ah yes, and E has developed a new way to make fun of me/annoy me (and when I say annoy, I actually mean it does somewhat bug me and I might bring it up): to annoy, he interrupts me when I'm midstory. People do that to me all the time, and it makes me feel like I'm boring them or they don't care what I have to say.
To mock, especially when I'm in a long story or concluding one, he says the Simpsons line about Grandpa saying, "so I took the ferry to Shelbyville and I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time..." and so on. He finds it hilarious. *grr*
And today is ghetto 70's underwear today. Shake it, baby!
2003/05/27
I am dumb. I came home last night, I was tired. I got on the computer, planning to stay for a few minutes.
People started talking to me. All of a sudden it was 2 a.m. and I still wasn't in bed yet. Urgh.
I set one alarm for 8:30, and the other for 9:00. I got out of bed at 9. :P
*mutter* Ah well. Let's see, yesterday: got 2 of my 3 errands done (I forgot to pick up my grad photos, which is why I was going to try to get downtown a bit early today... no go). Worked, had some food with the 19-year old, then headed over to the other work (where, in passing, we saw E). I was tired, but it was fun working with A and B, the new senior cash rep. He kept trying to push me around, and I kept trying to do the same to him; he was winning. :P Damn me and my Napoleon complex! :)
D came through just before my dinner, so he kept me company when I went over to the mall and got some more food. Went back and finished off the shift, then came home to be stupid. There you have it, my day. Ta-dah.
Stupid sister. She has to leave the house by 10, so she gets up at 9 and farts around, getting in the shower now (quarter after 9). She hasn't written her schedule on the calendar, so I have no concept of when she's working or not, so no way of knowing I'm going to have to play shower battle to get my chance to get in and clean. Stupid sister.
Oh yes, and in more weird news... turns out that D knows someone who happens to be the friend of a friend, and whom I just met. Weirdness abounds.
I spent some time at work yesterday writing out my list of things to do/upcoming events for the next little while. I'm going to be a very busy little person (what kind of preson are you?!) for the next week. :P :)
Some quotes from Shaolin Soccer, if you haven't already seen it:
What kind of preson are you?
Look at me, I am blad!
That was a big exploration! (instead of explosion)
And those are the only ones I can really remember. If you have two hours of your life you don't want back, rent it and watch it -- but rent the subtitled version, not the American version. Better, if such a thing can be said. :)
Anyhow, time to get moving. *sigh* I want sleep. :(
People started talking to me. All of a sudden it was 2 a.m. and I still wasn't in bed yet. Urgh.
I set one alarm for 8:30, and the other for 9:00. I got out of bed at 9. :P
*mutter* Ah well. Let's see, yesterday: got 2 of my 3 errands done (I forgot to pick up my grad photos, which is why I was going to try to get downtown a bit early today... no go). Worked, had some food with the 19-year old, then headed over to the other work (where, in passing, we saw E). I was tired, but it was fun working with A and B, the new senior cash rep. He kept trying to push me around, and I kept trying to do the same to him; he was winning. :P Damn me and my Napoleon complex! :)
D came through just before my dinner, so he kept me company when I went over to the mall and got some more food. Went back and finished off the shift, then came home to be stupid. There you have it, my day. Ta-dah.
Stupid sister. She has to leave the house by 10, so she gets up at 9 and farts around, getting in the shower now (quarter after 9). She hasn't written her schedule on the calendar, so I have no concept of when she's working or not, so no way of knowing I'm going to have to play shower battle to get my chance to get in and clean. Stupid sister.
Oh yes, and in more weird news... turns out that D knows someone who happens to be the friend of a friend, and whom I just met. Weirdness abounds.
I spent some time at work yesterday writing out my list of things to do/upcoming events for the next little while. I'm going to be a very busy little person (what kind of preson are you?!) for the next week. :P :)
Some quotes from Shaolin Soccer, if you haven't already seen it:
What kind of preson are you?
Look at me, I am blad!
That was a big exploration! (instead of explosion)
And those are the only ones I can really remember. If you have two hours of your life you don't want back, rent it and watch it -- but rent the subtitled version, not the American version. Better, if such a thing can be said. :)
Anyhow, time to get moving. *sigh* I want sleep. :(
2003/05/26
Dude. :)
Addictive and totally decadent. People are passionate about you - driven wild by your every move. You are often an object of desire, although you're usually too much to handle!
What Flavor Condom Are *You*?
More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva
You Are A Chocolate Flavored Condom!
Addictive and totally decadent. People are passionate about you - driven wild by your every move. You are often an object of desire, although you're usually too much to handle!
What Flavor Condom Are *You*?
More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva
Pretty unexpectedly intense evening. Had a weird not-fight with E, then a fair bit of silence while we both recovered our walls. Later, I laughed until I cried while he told me of playing with his action figures as a kid.
The rules, as they have been imparted to me:
1. You do not mess up a guy's hair when he has stuff in it.
2. They are action figures, not dolls.
Breaking both of these rules is muchly fun, and pouting while opening the eyes really big means that I get out of trouble, especially on the second one. It doesn't matter how much someone squeaks in anger and tells you they hate you, you can win.
Oh yes, and other rules are to be added as needed -- i.e., whenever they get thought up. Men are dumb. :)
The rules, as they have been imparted to me:
1. You do not mess up a guy's hair when he has stuff in it.
2. They are action figures, not dolls.
Breaking both of these rules is muchly fun, and pouting while opening the eyes really big means that I get out of trouble, especially on the second one. It doesn't matter how much someone squeaks in anger and tells you they hate you, you can win.
Oh yes, and other rules are to be added as needed -- i.e., whenever they get thought up. Men are dumb. :)
2003/05/25
Although it's really late (or early, depending on your pedantic bent) and I'm fairly tired (in spite of this evening's approximate 90-minute nap), I wanted to try to document this while it was still fairly fresh in my emotional cache (gawd, am I a nerd or what?).
Jay arrived in town this evening for Greg and Madeleine's wedding, so once his flight got in, there was assemblage at J's place. It was the first time I'd been to J's place with a group since, well, since my birthday last year, actually.
Anyhow, things were okay, I guess. We exchanged a bit of brief conversation in the kitchen when I went to see what was left of the Chinese food and get a beverage, and though I'd told myself I'd just treat him like anyone else in the group, I found it difficult to do so, at least entirely. I mean, everyone in that group is treated slightly differently by me, based on their personalities and behaviours and responses to me and my actions. How am I supposed to treat the last guy that really broke my heart?
Not to mention, seeing everyone paired off like that just... I don't know. It gets to me. I know that I make my own choices, and I know that for me right now, they're the right ones, but it doesn't help my feeling of being an outsider. Maybe in a way I feel that someone I date should be validated by the group, or receive their approval, but I know that's not necessarily accurate to how I feel. It'd be great if I dated someone that fit right in, but integration into a group like that is tricky, especially when some of them have been together for going on 10 years or more -- at least, that's how long *I've* known some of them.
So it got me to thinking about my relationship with J. It was good, it was fun, it was the shortest serious relationship I've had yet; funny in a way that when dating J, that relationship was considered valid and established (sorta), whereas when dating Mark, even though we'd been together nearly three times as long, it wasn't. That was my doing; I did keep Mark separate from the group because I wasn't sure how best to mesh them, but still.
That sounds like I'm blaming the group, and I'm not. I'm just tired and inarticulate.
Where was I? Oh yes, relationship evaluation. I used to think that if things improved with J's situation -- he got a job that didn't stress him out, he worked things out with his ex- and got that established, etc., etc., -- we'd get back together again. A part of me always knew that it was wrong and it wouldn't happen; after all, how often do people breakup and then stay together? Some are lucky enough to work past that, and I envy them, but at least in my history (chequered and poor as it may be), that's rarely the case.
So yes, I held out some little hope that maybe, just maybe, he and I could make it work. I held onto that for a lot longer than I care to admit to, although Jay's been aware of it the whole time; he was the one person that I regularly confessed in. Even though I cared about Mark deeply, and I feel that our time together was really wonderful, some small part of me still yearned for that "grown-up" relationship that J and I had.
Maybe it was the perceived feeling of acceptance that I had when he and I were together, or maybe it was what he represented to me -- the possibility of growing beyond my parents' home, beyond school, into a career, and being with someone who took me seriously as an equal (not that I'm saying others didn't, but the coworker sure didn't, and that's what I was working from before J) -- but I really enjoyed it and I really valued it. The group has been wonderful towards me during and since the breakup (which I will point out, was somewhere in the realm of 7 months ago; I'm not hung up, I'm just backstorying for you), and I know that I'm accepted as who I am; Jen, not J's girlfriend. I know that I have my own identity and my own place in the group, but sometimes seeing all the pairs just leaves me feeling alone.
And here I stall for a bit, to reflect on that. I'm trying to figure out the best way to segue into this next part, and I can't quite figure it out, so I'll continue.
I sat there tonight, as we watched a movie, all piled into J's small living room on whatever surfaces we could appropriate, and I was surrounded, for the most part, by couples, or parts of couples. The only singles there were J, Jay, and myself (and yes, there were other J-named people still there). I saw everyone cuddling, and I thought about how when J and I were together, I'd be thinking of how nice it would be to snuggle with him after everyone left. And I sat there on the couch, and I felt alone, and very vulnerable.
In a way, I feel vulnerable writing this now, knowing that a few people will read it and point it out to others, but I'm too tired to care; I'm very apathetic, and right now, I want to share.
So I left, to spend some time with a friend; someone that I knew wanted to hang out with me, someone who would enjoy my company and make me feel not alone. As I drove over to his place, in the rain, I started thinking of the reasons why things between J and I didn't work out. This is territory I've covered countless times (as Jay is well aware), but I uncovered a new patch today; perhaps he just didn't like me.
Perhaps he was content with the idea of a girlfriend, the sex, the companionship and so on and so forth, but that it was me he just couldn't tolerate. I remember Greg asking me one time what it was we had in common, and I wasn't really able to come up with a suitable answer. I can't really identify what any of my boyfriends and I have had in common, but it was the first time someone had asked me point-blank, and I couldn't answer. Maybe everyone else could see what I couldn't; that J and I were not a well-suited pair, and it was destined to fail from the beginning.
Maybe my raunchiness, my willingness to accept just about everything, my inability to keep my trap shut, my level of comfort with myself and some others... maybe my slobbiness, my laziness, my lack of a career, my lack of an apartment, my being in school, my being unfettered by any children but my cat and fish... maybe all of these things, things other people value and appreciate in me, maybe all of them were a complete anathema to J.
I'm not trying to say by any stretch of the imagination that I am perfect and should be adored by all; on the contrary, I'm frequently self-deprecating in my comments and my beliefs about myself, and E for one is near the point of violence when I start putting myself down. We're working on building one another's self-esteem. So maybe it's all the bad things that I could see in myself that J saw and disliked. Maybe, and for some reason this came as a huge revelation to me this evening, maybe he just doesn't like me. Or he grew to dislike me during our time together.
It's not the reason all relationships disintegrate; goodness knows I haven't disliked everyone I've broken up with by far, but it's certainly a valid reason for a breakup, and it's certainly something I'd have an altogether too-easy time believing of myself, depressing as that may be to some.
And so, here we are. I can't blame PMS, I can't blame stress, I can't blame fights with anyone. Maybe it's tiredness, or maybe it's just time that I started to wake up to certain things, but tonight's activities left me feeling alone, lonely and vulnerable. Although I've given up basically all of the hope that things might somehow someday work out for J and I, and either my walls have reestablished themselves enough to mostly protect me or I've moved on fairly well, but there's still some power there, and that's scary. It's scary that people retain the ability to hurt us, and we can't necessarily control it, much as some people I know would say otherwise.
I can't simply choose to no longer feel anything; it has to happen gradually. For the most part, I've been okay, but every now and then I get stupid again. Considering today was just one huge stupid day, well, I guess this is just par for the course.
Anyhow, that's probably more than any of you wanted to know. Full disclosure, honesty, and showing off my vulnerability. I did get some needed control at some point in the evening, but some of that emotional crap was still tagging on. I should get more sleep.
Jay arrived in town this evening for Greg and Madeleine's wedding, so once his flight got in, there was assemblage at J's place. It was the first time I'd been to J's place with a group since, well, since my birthday last year, actually.
Anyhow, things were okay, I guess. We exchanged a bit of brief conversation in the kitchen when I went to see what was left of the Chinese food and get a beverage, and though I'd told myself I'd just treat him like anyone else in the group, I found it difficult to do so, at least entirely. I mean, everyone in that group is treated slightly differently by me, based on their personalities and behaviours and responses to me and my actions. How am I supposed to treat the last guy that really broke my heart?
Not to mention, seeing everyone paired off like that just... I don't know. It gets to me. I know that I make my own choices, and I know that for me right now, they're the right ones, but it doesn't help my feeling of being an outsider. Maybe in a way I feel that someone I date should be validated by the group, or receive their approval, but I know that's not necessarily accurate to how I feel. It'd be great if I dated someone that fit right in, but integration into a group like that is tricky, especially when some of them have been together for going on 10 years or more -- at least, that's how long *I've* known some of them.
So it got me to thinking about my relationship with J. It was good, it was fun, it was the shortest serious relationship I've had yet; funny in a way that when dating J, that relationship was considered valid and established (sorta), whereas when dating Mark, even though we'd been together nearly three times as long, it wasn't. That was my doing; I did keep Mark separate from the group because I wasn't sure how best to mesh them, but still.
That sounds like I'm blaming the group, and I'm not. I'm just tired and inarticulate.
Where was I? Oh yes, relationship evaluation. I used to think that if things improved with J's situation -- he got a job that didn't stress him out, he worked things out with his ex- and got that established, etc., etc., -- we'd get back together again. A part of me always knew that it was wrong and it wouldn't happen; after all, how often do people breakup and then stay together? Some are lucky enough to work past that, and I envy them, but at least in my history (chequered and poor as it may be), that's rarely the case.
So yes, I held out some little hope that maybe, just maybe, he and I could make it work. I held onto that for a lot longer than I care to admit to, although Jay's been aware of it the whole time; he was the one person that I regularly confessed in. Even though I cared about Mark deeply, and I feel that our time together was really wonderful, some small part of me still yearned for that "grown-up" relationship that J and I had.
Maybe it was the perceived feeling of acceptance that I had when he and I were together, or maybe it was what he represented to me -- the possibility of growing beyond my parents' home, beyond school, into a career, and being with someone who took me seriously as an equal (not that I'm saying others didn't, but the coworker sure didn't, and that's what I was working from before J) -- but I really enjoyed it and I really valued it. The group has been wonderful towards me during and since the breakup (which I will point out, was somewhere in the realm of 7 months ago; I'm not hung up, I'm just backstorying for you), and I know that I'm accepted as who I am; Jen, not J's girlfriend. I know that I have my own identity and my own place in the group, but sometimes seeing all the pairs just leaves me feeling alone.
And here I stall for a bit, to reflect on that. I'm trying to figure out the best way to segue into this next part, and I can't quite figure it out, so I'll continue.
I sat there tonight, as we watched a movie, all piled into J's small living room on whatever surfaces we could appropriate, and I was surrounded, for the most part, by couples, or parts of couples. The only singles there were J, Jay, and myself (and yes, there were other J-named people still there). I saw everyone cuddling, and I thought about how when J and I were together, I'd be thinking of how nice it would be to snuggle with him after everyone left. And I sat there on the couch, and I felt alone, and very vulnerable.
In a way, I feel vulnerable writing this now, knowing that a few people will read it and point it out to others, but I'm too tired to care; I'm very apathetic, and right now, I want to share.
So I left, to spend some time with a friend; someone that I knew wanted to hang out with me, someone who would enjoy my company and make me feel not alone. As I drove over to his place, in the rain, I started thinking of the reasons why things between J and I didn't work out. This is territory I've covered countless times (as Jay is well aware), but I uncovered a new patch today; perhaps he just didn't like me.
Perhaps he was content with the idea of a girlfriend, the sex, the companionship and so on and so forth, but that it was me he just couldn't tolerate. I remember Greg asking me one time what it was we had in common, and I wasn't really able to come up with a suitable answer. I can't really identify what any of my boyfriends and I have had in common, but it was the first time someone had asked me point-blank, and I couldn't answer. Maybe everyone else could see what I couldn't; that J and I were not a well-suited pair, and it was destined to fail from the beginning.
Maybe my raunchiness, my willingness to accept just about everything, my inability to keep my trap shut, my level of comfort with myself and some others... maybe my slobbiness, my laziness, my lack of a career, my lack of an apartment, my being in school, my being unfettered by any children but my cat and fish... maybe all of these things, things other people value and appreciate in me, maybe all of them were a complete anathema to J.
I'm not trying to say by any stretch of the imagination that I am perfect and should be adored by all; on the contrary, I'm frequently self-deprecating in my comments and my beliefs about myself, and E for one is near the point of violence when I start putting myself down. We're working on building one another's self-esteem. So maybe it's all the bad things that I could see in myself that J saw and disliked. Maybe, and for some reason this came as a huge revelation to me this evening, maybe he just doesn't like me. Or he grew to dislike me during our time together.
It's not the reason all relationships disintegrate; goodness knows I haven't disliked everyone I've broken up with by far, but it's certainly a valid reason for a breakup, and it's certainly something I'd have an altogether too-easy time believing of myself, depressing as that may be to some.
And so, here we are. I can't blame PMS, I can't blame stress, I can't blame fights with anyone. Maybe it's tiredness, or maybe it's just time that I started to wake up to certain things, but tonight's activities left me feeling alone, lonely and vulnerable. Although I've given up basically all of the hope that things might somehow someday work out for J and I, and either my walls have reestablished themselves enough to mostly protect me or I've moved on fairly well, but there's still some power there, and that's scary. It's scary that people retain the ability to hurt us, and we can't necessarily control it, much as some people I know would say otherwise.
I can't simply choose to no longer feel anything; it has to happen gradually. For the most part, I've been okay, but every now and then I get stupid again. Considering today was just one huge stupid day, well, I guess this is just par for the course.
Anyhow, that's probably more than any of you wanted to know. Full disclosure, honesty, and showing off my vulnerability. I did get some needed control at some point in the evening, but some of that emotional crap was still tagging on. I should get more sleep.
2003/05/24
I got my hair cut today. I have pretty hair. :)
Walking to catch the bus (which wound up becoming a cab -- stupid me, forgetting that the buses don't run so late on weeknights), got accosted (sorta) by a crazy bum. E and I were walking along ('cause I insist on an escort late at night), and this bum tells us we should go have sex (after hollering some other shit, too). I'm like, okay... weird bum. So, being stupid (it's nearly one in the morning, after all), I say, "too late!" :P
Well, the bum takes that as an invitation to follow us or something, and he does. He catches up to us as we're about to cross the street, and says that maybe we should go have sex five times then. I'm just trying not to look at him, and E's getting kinda annoyed with this guy, and tells him to leave us alone or some such. As we're crossing the street, the bum's hollering something like, "listen to the whipped, telling me to go away!" or something ... I can't really remember, and I didn't really catch it, but it was funny and I was starting to get slightly worried he'd keep following us.
Fortunately, by the time that we came back out of the mall (after I grabbed some cash for a cab), he was gone. Eesh.
Moral of this story: Don't tell a bum "too late" when he tells you to go have sex. For some reason, it only upsets him, even if you're only doing it 'cause he was being stupid in the first place.
Walking to catch the bus (which wound up becoming a cab -- stupid me, forgetting that the buses don't run so late on weeknights), got accosted (sorta) by a crazy bum. E and I were walking along ('cause I insist on an escort late at night), and this bum tells us we should go have sex (after hollering some other shit, too). I'm like, okay... weird bum. So, being stupid (it's nearly one in the morning, after all), I say, "too late!" :P
Well, the bum takes that as an invitation to follow us or something, and he does. He catches up to us as we're about to cross the street, and says that maybe we should go have sex five times then. I'm just trying not to look at him, and E's getting kinda annoyed with this guy, and tells him to leave us alone or some such. As we're crossing the street, the bum's hollering something like, "listen to the whipped, telling me to go away!" or something ... I can't really remember, and I didn't really catch it, but it was funny and I was starting to get slightly worried he'd keep following us.
Fortunately, by the time that we came back out of the mall (after I grabbed some cash for a cab), he was gone. Eesh.
Moral of this story: Don't tell a bum "too late" when he tells you to go have sex. For some reason, it only upsets him, even if you're only doing it 'cause he was being stupid in the first place.
2003/05/23
Okay, the promised embarrassing story:
One day, shortly after getting "friendly" with someone I was seeing, we were having a conversation about weight. He was interested in losing weight, and stated that he'd recently hit 200 even. I asked if he'd lost any since, since he was wanting to get beneath 200, and he said that he'd only weighed himself the day before, and he wasn't really going to lose that soon.
I said I didn't realize that it'd only been the day before that he'd weighed himself, but that afterall, being under 200 was only a matter of ounces, so it was possible it'd happened already.
He said yeah, that's true, and after all, I haven't eaten for four days.
I said, I happen to know that that's not true.
Slowly, my brain kicked over the possible (and actual) double entendreness of that remark, and about the same time he started to grin (or maybe just before), I smacked him and said, 'Because we had dinner the night before, you asshole!'
Anyhow, I thought it was fucking hilarious, but maybe that's just me. :)
So, what else is new? Hung out for awhile with the 19-year old last night; turns out he and my sister used to take the bus together sometimes, 'cause he was dating a girl who went to my sister's school. Yeesh.
Going to a potluck tonight with E, and we're going to catch the game there, I imagine. Go Sens!
Which reminds me; Wednesday night I finished up work and headed over to catch the bus. I walk through a mall to get to where my bus stop is, and there's a restaurant there right on one end. Standing outside of the restaurant was a crowd of about twenty to thirty people, all watching the television that was up in the corner. Just as I passed through the crowd, a cheer went up -- it was pretty obvious we'd won the game. Sometimes, I really love my city. :)
Wednesday night was pretty dull at work, actually. No one was around, and all the managers were out it seemed, so we were having fun being stupid and goofing around. I was spending most of my time chatting and laughing with A and the 19-year old, and talking about all kinds of stupid stuff, mostly sex-related. Because yes, as people have said, whenever I'm involved in a conversation, things appear to go that way. :P
Ah well... trying to think of what else is interesting. The week has really flown by; I can't even really say what I've done, aside from work. :P Tuesday, my day off, I spent a bunch of time watching Sex and the City and Buffy, I'm sure... nothing very exciting. Got some mad snuggles from Shadow. :) I woke up one morning with her using my foot as a pillow, which was pretty cute -- usually it's Digger that does that.
This morning I came downstairs to give her a belly scritch. She was all folded up on the chair in the living room, looking really cute. Her and Digger will spoon together, and he'll wash her head while she purrs -- it's all very cute. :)
It's weird to think that in less than a week I'll be in New Brunswick, anticipating my cousin's wedding. She's going all crazy-like; she asked my dad to do the pictures for it, then cancelled it last night 'cause he was going to be too expensive, then my nanny got pissed off and rehired my dad. :) My cousin is the first of us seven granddaughters to get married, so my nanny definitely wants to have pictures -- there will be no cancelling, and I kinda agree with her.
Of course, that's not to say that my nanny hasn't had her crazy moments, too. My cousin's hall got double-booked, so they moved her to another one, but this one didn't have servers included. My nanny suggested that my cousin ask her friends and cousins to act as waitstaff at her wedding.
Uh huh.
I want to travel 24 hours round-trip by car to your wedding so I can dress up and be a waitress at it. No thank you; I'll just look at the pictures later and work in the meantime, thank you very much. :P Luckily, she never asked us to do it, so I didn't have to get grouchy about it. My mom told my nanny that was a stupid idea, and I guess maybe she took it to heart, or they worked something out.
And yes, I'll reiterate as my mom frequently did; it wasn't my cousin's idea, it was my nanny's. :)
Weddings make people crazy, and I think maybe I'll just elope, if I ever find someone dumb enough to marry me. ;)
One day, shortly after getting "friendly" with someone I was seeing, we were having a conversation about weight. He was interested in losing weight, and stated that he'd recently hit 200 even. I asked if he'd lost any since, since he was wanting to get beneath 200, and he said that he'd only weighed himself the day before, and he wasn't really going to lose that soon.
I said I didn't realize that it'd only been the day before that he'd weighed himself, but that afterall, being under 200 was only a matter of ounces, so it was possible it'd happened already.
He said yeah, that's true, and after all, I haven't eaten for four days.
I said, I happen to know that that's not true.
Slowly, my brain kicked over the possible (and actual) double entendreness of that remark, and about the same time he started to grin (or maybe just before), I smacked him and said, 'Because we had dinner the night before, you asshole!'
Anyhow, I thought it was fucking hilarious, but maybe that's just me. :)
So, what else is new? Hung out for awhile with the 19-year old last night; turns out he and my sister used to take the bus together sometimes, 'cause he was dating a girl who went to my sister's school. Yeesh.
Going to a potluck tonight with E, and we're going to catch the game there, I imagine. Go Sens!
Which reminds me; Wednesday night I finished up work and headed over to catch the bus. I walk through a mall to get to where my bus stop is, and there's a restaurant there right on one end. Standing outside of the restaurant was a crowd of about twenty to thirty people, all watching the television that was up in the corner. Just as I passed through the crowd, a cheer went up -- it was pretty obvious we'd won the game. Sometimes, I really love my city. :)
Wednesday night was pretty dull at work, actually. No one was around, and all the managers were out it seemed, so we were having fun being stupid and goofing around. I was spending most of my time chatting and laughing with A and the 19-year old, and talking about all kinds of stupid stuff, mostly sex-related. Because yes, as people have said, whenever I'm involved in a conversation, things appear to go that way. :P
Ah well... trying to think of what else is interesting. The week has really flown by; I can't even really say what I've done, aside from work. :P Tuesday, my day off, I spent a bunch of time watching Sex and the City and Buffy, I'm sure... nothing very exciting. Got some mad snuggles from Shadow. :) I woke up one morning with her using my foot as a pillow, which was pretty cute -- usually it's Digger that does that.
This morning I came downstairs to give her a belly scritch. She was all folded up on the chair in the living room, looking really cute. Her and Digger will spoon together, and he'll wash her head while she purrs -- it's all very cute. :)
It's weird to think that in less than a week I'll be in New Brunswick, anticipating my cousin's wedding. She's going all crazy-like; she asked my dad to do the pictures for it, then cancelled it last night 'cause he was going to be too expensive, then my nanny got pissed off and rehired my dad. :) My cousin is the first of us seven granddaughters to get married, so my nanny definitely wants to have pictures -- there will be no cancelling, and I kinda agree with her.
Of course, that's not to say that my nanny hasn't had her crazy moments, too. My cousin's hall got double-booked, so they moved her to another one, but this one didn't have servers included. My nanny suggested that my cousin ask her friends and cousins to act as waitstaff at her wedding.
Uh huh.
I want to travel 24 hours round-trip by car to your wedding so I can dress up and be a waitress at it. No thank you; I'll just look at the pictures later and work in the meantime, thank you very much. :P Luckily, she never asked us to do it, so I didn't have to get grouchy about it. My mom told my nanny that was a stupid idea, and I guess maybe she took it to heart, or they worked something out.
And yes, I'll reiterate as my mom frequently did; it wasn't my cousin's idea, it was my nanny's. :)
Weddings make people crazy, and I think maybe I'll just elope, if I ever find someone dumb enough to marry me. ;)
2003/05/22
I have an embarrassing story to share here, but no time in which to do it. It's pretty old, anyhow.
In the meantime, here's an embarrassing conversation that took place with someone else last night. :)
[in discussing how I don't have any interest in someone I think might still be interested]
Friend: I think [he]'s pretty mature.
Friend: If you need help, I'll distract him for you. :)
Me: *grin* You'll show some leg? :)
Friend: Shake my pasty white be-pimpled ass at him, and he'll go all pavlovian. :)
Me: Errrm... ew?
Friend: [I] got back, baybee. :)
Me: Man, if you thought I wasn't sleeping with you *before*...
Me: ;)
Friend: I'll unleash a bottle of clearasil on my hiney just for you. :)
Me: *rofl* On the site!
Friend: *laugh* Bitch! :) You can't just quote me every thirty seconds! ;)
And it kept going from there. Fun-ny!
Anyhow, must get dressed and head off to work. For some reason, they just don't accept "naked" as being within the dress code. :P More from me later.
In the meantime, here's an embarrassing conversation that took place with someone else last night. :)
[in discussing how I don't have any interest in someone I think might still be interested]
Friend: I think [he]'s pretty mature.
Friend: If you need help, I'll distract him for you. :)
Me: *grin* You'll show some leg? :)
Friend: Shake my pasty white be-pimpled ass at him, and he'll go all pavlovian. :)
Me: Errrm... ew?
Friend: [I] got back, baybee. :)
Me: Man, if you thought I wasn't sleeping with you *before*...
Me: ;)
Friend: I'll unleash a bottle of clearasil on my hiney just for you. :)
Me: *rofl* On the site!
Friend: *laugh* Bitch! :) You can't just quote me every thirty seconds! ;)
And it kept going from there. Fun-ny!
Anyhow, must get dressed and head off to work. For some reason, they just don't accept "naked" as being within the dress code. :P More from me later.
2003/05/20
Okay, so I've been busy the last while, and too tired to post very much. I'm too tired to really post right now, but I figure at the very least I must mention Buffy.
Was I disappointed with it? Maybe a little. It ended about the way I expected it would. I'm a little surprised that some of the people who would up dying, especially if my dad was right with the cast changes for next season on Angel; I'd love to see how they explain some of it, but I can imagine at least one explanation for it.
Okay, too vague and I'm annoying myself. For anyone that hasn't seen it, stop reading or whine later, 'cause this is your spoiler warning.
Spike dies in a blaze of glory -- somewhat literally -- and according to my dad, he's part of the Angel cast for next season. Best I can figure, they're going to resurrect him in Hell (or Heaven) and let him come back, claiming that since he had a soul and died nobley (nobely?), he can have another life. Or something; maybe Willow will magic him back, since he died from mystical energy and not a stake through the heart. Although my dad claimed that he got staked, and that's when he started being the sun, but I don't know.
Jay's been busy insulting me tonight: so far he's called me a kazoo and a person with a mean nose. I can barely see to type through the tears.
What else? Enjoyed the day off today, doing very little overall. Got some snugglage from Shadow, and Digger rested with Kim and I when we watched some Sex and the City. It was a rude episode; we covered his eyes. Or at least told him not to watch; since he was asleep, that wasn't a huge problem.
I've been enjoying the hanging out with the various peoples the last little while. Yesterday I got up early to go over to N's and watch as much of the Buffy marathon as we could. We were actually somewhat cheesed with it, though -- those who voted picked depressing, pivotal episodes. Sure, they're important to the series as a whole, but we were saying we wouldn't've necessarily picked them as "best." And of course, Hush and Once More With Feeling, the two we were waiting on, were the only two we didn't get to watch, seeing as how N and I had to work.
Work was pretty slow, actually. Nono, it was very slow; the longest four hours I've worked. :P I got together with E afterwards, and we grabbed some food and a drink at a restaurant nearby. Fun times.
What else? Well, Sunday I did my usual work and hung out with E for a bit after work -- we split fajitas, and they were surprisingly good. Saturday appears to be just a blur... oh yeah, work and then hung out with C for awhile. It's all coming back to me now.
Today I got to do some chatting with various friends online, and I set up an LJ account so I can read other people's "secret" journals. Stupid LJ annoys the crap out of me.
I know I still have to write about Friday's excursion of hilarity, but that'll come later. Right now, I'm really quite zonked and I think it's time for bed. I need to remember to pick up some new shirts or something tomorrow for work; I have a finite amount, and there is dispute over the blueness of my blue shirt. Plus, it's warming up and I don't have the patience to iron my shirts all the time, so... I want some non-blouses. :)
Dur, almost forgot. Chatted with Mark for a bit today, which was nice; I haven't seen him online in awhile, and I've had such a stupid schedule this week, so I haven't had the chance to call anyone. It was good to talk to him -- thinking about someone all the time just doesn't compare to actually getting to talk to/see them.
Was I disappointed with it? Maybe a little. It ended about the way I expected it would. I'm a little surprised that some of the people who would up dying, especially if my dad was right with the cast changes for next season on Angel; I'd love to see how they explain some of it, but I can imagine at least one explanation for it.
Okay, too vague and I'm annoying myself. For anyone that hasn't seen it, stop reading or whine later, 'cause this is your spoiler warning.
Spike dies in a blaze of glory -- somewhat literally -- and according to my dad, he's part of the Angel cast for next season. Best I can figure, they're going to resurrect him in Hell (or Heaven) and let him come back, claiming that since he had a soul and died nobley (nobely?), he can have another life. Or something; maybe Willow will magic him back, since he died from mystical energy and not a stake through the heart. Although my dad claimed that he got staked, and that's when he started being the sun, but I don't know.
Jay's been busy insulting me tonight: so far he's called me a kazoo and a person with a mean nose. I can barely see to type through the tears.
What else? Enjoyed the day off today, doing very little overall. Got some snugglage from Shadow, and Digger rested with Kim and I when we watched some Sex and the City. It was a rude episode; we covered his eyes. Or at least told him not to watch; since he was asleep, that wasn't a huge problem.
I've been enjoying the hanging out with the various peoples the last little while. Yesterday I got up early to go over to N's and watch as much of the Buffy marathon as we could. We were actually somewhat cheesed with it, though -- those who voted picked depressing, pivotal episodes. Sure, they're important to the series as a whole, but we were saying we wouldn't've necessarily picked them as "best." And of course, Hush and Once More With Feeling, the two we were waiting on, were the only two we didn't get to watch, seeing as how N and I had to work.
Work was pretty slow, actually. Nono, it was very slow; the longest four hours I've worked. :P I got together with E afterwards, and we grabbed some food and a drink at a restaurant nearby. Fun times.
What else? Well, Sunday I did my usual work and hung out with E for a bit after work -- we split fajitas, and they were surprisingly good. Saturday appears to be just a blur... oh yeah, work and then hung out with C for awhile. It's all coming back to me now.
Today I got to do some chatting with various friends online, and I set up an LJ account so I can read other people's "secret" journals. Stupid LJ annoys the crap out of me.
I know I still have to write about Friday's excursion of hilarity, but that'll come later. Right now, I'm really quite zonked and I think it's time for bed. I need to remember to pick up some new shirts or something tomorrow for work; I have a finite amount, and there is dispute over the blueness of my blue shirt. Plus, it's warming up and I don't have the patience to iron my shirts all the time, so... I want some non-blouses. :)
Dur, almost forgot. Chatted with Mark for a bit today, which was nice; I haven't seen him online in awhile, and I've had such a stupid schedule this week, so I haven't had the chance to call anyone. It was good to talk to him -- thinking about someone all the time just doesn't compare to actually getting to talk to/see them.
You are a Pirate Second Class
What's Yer Inner Pirate?
brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!
Do you remember the last time you took a chance? I do. It was when you decided to leave the security of your mother's womb and headed for the bright light. It's time to head for the next bright light, my friend. Creativity is not your strong suit. You are good at doing what you are told to do and that, in itself, is a gift. It's not a gift to you, mind you, but rather a gift to those who will be there to tell you what to do. You like long walks on the beach and cuddling, but would never admit that to your guy friends who think you are okay but can't always remember your name. Tapioca pudding seems a bit extreme for a fellow such as
yerself, what with all the bumps and stuff. It's a good thing ye be on a pirate ship, otherwise, ye'd would be walkin' because ye be positively pedestrian. Have a nice day.
What's Yer Inner Pirate?
brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!
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